Latrine America and the Mulatos

Juan Abreu in his Emanaciones #1315 (my translation):


My friend Victor likes to refer to Latin America as “Latrine America,” and the truth is that after watching the spectacle of CELAC in Chile, you would be hard pressed to find a more appropriate name. What I would have liked to have seen is someone publishing photos of Raul’s giant mulato bodyguards. But alas, none have been published. We already know that the Commandant has exquisite taste when it comes to choosing mulatos who are well endowed.

But back to what I was getting at, this CELAC is an invention of Chavez the chimpanzee. In other words, an invention of Raul because Chavez is nothing more than Raul’s servant. Therefore, it is perfectly logical for Raul to be named the president of his own invention. It makes sense.

I saw the Latrine American leaders on the television. Evo with that crazy look on his face, Cristina indistinguishable from a ball of recently used toilet paper, Piñera pleading with Raul to turn over some assassins hiding out in Cuba, and Rajoy begging Raul to return a building in Havana.

Of all the European presidents, only Ms. Merkel had a modicum of decency to ignore and walk past Raul as if he were a duck dropping. The rest of the leaders were all enthralled with Raul.

In all honesty, as much sense as this could make, I believe the Latrine American presidents had no choice other than to select Raul as their new Madam President, I mean president. Let us not forget those well-endowed mulatos played a fundamental role during those negotiations.



One thought on “Latrine America and the Mulatos

  1. Cretina “indistinguishable from a piece of recently used toilet paper.” Perfect, or damn close. The man is good, but then again, he’s a published writer. However, even if he wrote exquisite poetry, he’d NEVER get tapped by the Obama people to write anything, and I highly doubt he’d ever get interviewed by Anderson Cooper. For one thing, I’m not sure Cooper would come out alive. Still, this is the least the Latrines deserve from us: spitting scorn, the more scathing the better. If nothing else, Abreu makes me want to sharpen my knives. But don’t get me wrong: no matter how swinish the Latrines may be, they always have the excuse that they’re not Cubans, so when Cubans are no better, they are clearly worse and deserve worse. In other words, reserve the sharpest knives for home use.

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