Now for some REALLY important news…

Rush hour in central Havana
Rush hour in central Havana

Hard-hitting journalism at its very best.

And, oh, those ever-charming Cuban primitives.  As Walter Schadenfreulich of Onganowanga, Wisconsin might say: “My, my, Mildred, they’re like adorable, mischievous monkeys.  So much zest for life, so much clowning around.”

Bit by bit, the Associated Press, Reuters, etc… want  to hypnotize their readers into believing  that Castrogonia is charmingly primitive, but normal.   To do this, they fish for stories in the propaganda rags published by the Ministry of Truth, and the more insignificant the details, the more they seem to love them.  Never mind the big picture.  And also never mind accuracy.  Take a close look at the fourth sentence in the piece below: when is the last time you heard a Cuban refer to a car as an “auto”?

…. and…. did it ever occur to this intrepid reporter that Cubans jaywalk so much because there are so few cars on the road?

Good God almighty, where do they find these “journalists”?  Oh, how easy it is to forget: yes, of course,at the same place that Cuba analysts/specialists/experts are trained…

Cuba, a nation of brazen jaywalkers, asks island scofflaws to mind the rules of the road

HAVANA – Teenagers dash across a six-lane thoroughfare and launch themselves into the balmy waters of the Straits of Florida.

A couple skips the sidewalk and strolls down an unlit street as bulky 1950s cars with bald tires and worn brakes zip past inches away.

“Here there is no custom of using the crosswalk,” said Maria Rubio, a 55-year-old Havana resident who had just sauntered across the six lanes of bustling 23rd Street, mere steps from a zebra-striped crossing. “We simply cross wherever we are.”

Jaywalking is endemic in Havana, where islanders seem to treat the streets like a real-life version of the video game Frogger, weaving in and out of traffic while risking life and limb to reach the other side. Locals call it “toreando autos” — “bullfighting with cars.”

Now authorities are trying to do something about the lack of caution, which they say contributes to hundreds of pedestrians being struck each year.

A recent full-page spread in the state newspaper Juventud Rebelde, titled “Lethal imprudence,” showed photos of Cubans darting in front of oncoming cars. It also gave rare data on traffic accidents, saying more than 1,300 pedestrians are mowed down each year in this nation of 11 million people. About one in seven of those accidents is fatal.

“A catalog of suffering that can be overcome only through love of life and sufficient caution,” the brief accompanying text said.

Official newspapers like Juventud Rebelde are commonly used to push campaigns against various forms of “social indiscipline,” such as wasteful overuse of air conditioners and tardiness by workers in getting to their government jobs.

Read more HERE, if you aren’t already bored to tears…

2 thoughts on “Now for some REALLY important news…”

  1. But Carlos, you say that like you’re surprised. These hacks, I mean reporters, are only doing what their employers want and pay for, which is obviously not real (let alone serious) journalism. I believe it’s called Havana bureau protection, at least in polite circles. The closer we get to the demise of Castro I, with the attendant funerary extravaganza and international media orgy, I mean frenzy, the more these people will do WHATEVER it takes to secure their piece of that action. Besides, what you’re pointing out, while certainly disreputable, unseemly and even laughable, is relatively low-level BS. We’re not talking Herbert Matthews and the New York Times here, which was, in effect, criminal misinformation that caused very serious harm.

  2. You are so right…and I agree with you 100%. But I’m not surprised, just highly amused and irritated at the same time, and I adopt a certain voice when pointing out such nonsense. I’m reminded of my elementary school days in Havana. Every time some kid ripped his pants and we could see his underwear we would keep pointing to the rip all day long and make comments about the skid marks on his calzoncillos. One day, a kid who ripped his pants wasn’t wearing any underwear. Boy, did he get it from the rest of us. We were merciless. I guess I’ve never been able to shake that impulse, especially when it comes to the craven imbeciles who write news stories about Cuba. Their pants are ripped, they have no underwear, and, on top of that, their nalgas are smeared with mierda.

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